Authors are routinely asked by aspiring writers how to better their craft, and invariably they are encouraged to write passionately about what they know. But, I believe it is also reasonable to do so with balance and perspective. This advice can be extended to anyone who wants to better understand gender issues. It definitely applies to someone representing our community using a public forum.

Recently, I came across a transgender person's article in a major magazine which said that most transgenders bring misery upon themselves. It was disheartening to hear harsh criticism of people's individualized gender expression and transition choices. It was also apparent the author entirely ignored the fact that transgender folks come from a diversity of educational, social and economic backgrounds.

That individual certainly didn't speak for me (as a transgender woman), and some of the article's contents were so judgmental I truly doubted it represented the opinion of many. Indeed, this the inherent danger of speaking on behalf of a community. Before assuming an advocacy role I suggest learning about what other kinds of people make up our community. While it is impossible to meet every transgender person, it is worthwhile to network and learn about people learn how their pathways differ and converge. During such an inquiry to gain information about what other's lives and opinions are like, question asking is an imperative.

What gender stereotypes exist and how do individuals defy these? Why is it that some transfolks cannot afford surgery? What resources and educational backgrounds do people actually have? How would improving these better their lives? How does a lack of resources or education effect their transition and social acceptability? What of folks who are living with chronic illness? How does illness effect that person? What minorities and issues exist within the community, and which of these are least commonly addressed?

Interestingly, in the magazine feature which sparked this article, the author didn't want to be identified with homosexual politics and expressed a number of bigoted statements. It is an author's right to state personal opinions as long as these are identified as such because they do not represent our entire community. In response I wrote the individual and encouraged considerably more discretion in public voice. I informed the author that homosexuals prefer to be called gays or lesbians and that racial issues divide as well as unite people. I also pointed out that it is important to our community that many gays and lesbians have frequently joined the transgender diaspora by welcoming us in their organizations and supporting our healthcare and legal efforts. No matter how we define our personal lives we cannot forget these very public efforts by others to help our people.

Dialogue is also critical when you as an individual encounter bigoted or myopic statements made by community members. In this instance, I used considerable restraint and simply pointed out to the author (in writing) how the article might have been improved for a more professional polish. Writing is so very personal its important to keep things balanced. While it is impossible to trade places with all people, it costs us nothing to take into account their experiences, needs and differences. In fact, doing so may be our saving grace, because hopefully people will show us the same respectful, compassionate recognition.