Every once in awhile I receive an inquiry that is new, refreshing and fascinates me. For instance, not so long ago I was contacted by an individual hosting a series of workshops, one of which introduced the subject of transgender values. And, the individual asked if I had any input.

Transgender Values? What are those? I thought about it and decided that values are an evolving dynamic - and all the more so for transgender men and women because our lives challenge us in so many different ways.

On the surface, prior to transition, we carry with us an awareness that somehow we are different. At times people embrace the concept that others may be different or have alternative thinking. Just as often, however, these things are correlated with fears of loss and people become closed to new ideas. Change becomes the enemy, or at least it seems so until one recognizes that without change and growth a person can only be left with stagnation and death.

Do transgender people actually have values? You can bet your life on it. Those of us who have children have no less values than non-transgender parents. Our people who participate in politics, activism and contribute to the community certainly have values.

Are there any values which are specific or at least special to the transgender experience. Yes, privacy about our gender identity and special needs can be one. From the closeted or stealth person, to the most out or visible member of our community, we all self-define a level of privacy which works for us. Not merely good etiquette, each of us generally knows that allowing others to define privacy for themselves is an important aspect to out lives. Without respecting privacy we may be placing others at risk of danger.

Another value is allowing others to follow a path of self-determination when it comes to gender identity. Certainly, we may not always agree with each other's needs and labels, because these often vastly differ, but it is a transgender value to not interfere with others right to choose.

Are there times when transgender values are not evident? Sadly, this is sometimes the case. It occurs when infighting and back-stabbing occurs so much so that people feel inclined to say that there is no such thing as a transgender community. It also happens when transgender folks participate within the community, but do not make a significant effort to either include all or provide adequate referrals so that other transfolks get their needs met, too.

Interestingly, for many years I've promoted the idea that transgender men and women should considered ambassadors for our community. That is realistic value because if you're visible, you represent all of us. If someone gives you hard time, learn how to assess the situation and deal with it - so the next transgender person that follows your is treated better.

Should we impose our transgender values on others? Probably not. But, it is reasonable to ask that our needs get met. For example, disclosing your status as a transman or woman doesn't mean we want everyone else to become transgender. Choosing to disclose is saying you're human. Being respected and an active participant in society is essential to us allthis is a value no person should relinquish.